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Friday, November 22nd, 2002
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12:51 pm - Things to talk about
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Quit making my girlfriend and my life the center of your fucked up little world.
Let it drop, it has been 4 months.
You don't know what you are talking about, so please don't pretend to.
You have no right to talk about my girlfriends thighs when you have a roll sloshing over your bathing suit bottom in this picture

This picture below is right after we all went to the club. What kind of face is that?

In short, I would please ask you to refrain from mentioning my life, or the life of my friends, or girlfriend any longer. I honestly don't understand why you would want to waste your time with something as repulsive as we are. I don't understand why if we are such a waste of time and space, you continue to waste your time and space. Do not use the amusment factor either, because that is a cop out. Do you honestly just have nothing better to do? Go watch a movie, feed the homeless, sterilize yourself I don't care. I would also consider getting legal advice from the stunt you pulled at Zen Fest. I have been in contact with the County Sherriff's Office and have filled out the necessary paperwork to take action against both of you. I guarantee if you do not leave us alone, then you will go to jail.
Thank you much :)
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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| Tuesday, October 29th, 2002
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2:24 pm - SP
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| Thursday, October 24th, 2002
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3:36 pm - Erin has a new nickname..
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Please apply when talking to her...
The name is Triclops
Thanks!
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(comment on this)
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| Tuesday, October 22nd, 2002
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8:28 am - Friends Only
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| Tuesday, April 2nd, 2002
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2:23 pm - If ya need a laugh...
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Call Enron and listen to their new menu options
:)
213-213-6070
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(comment on this)
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| Wednesday, March 27th, 2002
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10:00 am - In an effort...
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In an effort to better serve myself while I am bored here at work, I would like to reach out to some of the friends on my friend list.
I have been debating on whether or not to do this, cause if there is a poor turnout I would feel completely useless and end up grabbing an ak-47 and probably laying waste to my office, and then turning it on myself.... just kidding..
Anyhow, this is what I propose..
I have been told by a more than a couple people that I am one of the best story tellers\bullshitters that has graced this side of the Mississippi. All the other BS's are in Washington D.C.
Anyhow, I ask you now for a topic. This will be a daily thing, and I will choose 1 topic from the list(I better get a list you lazy no commenting bastards) and from that topic I will expand on a story, or an explanation for your daily reading pleasure. Now if I don't pick your topic, please do not be angry. I will do my best to give everyone a chance at providing that topic for me. If you like it, then let me know. If you don't then you can go grab a 4 inch long vibrating sheep cock, and shove it in your rectum. Mmmmmmmkay?
Let it begin...
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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| Wednesday, March 20th, 2002
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4:37 pm - Jail Pic..
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One of Erin's friends got locked down in the same County Jail as I did, and I stole the link from him with the mugshots on it. Here is mine...

If you will notice the bruise on my left cheeck under my eye, that is when I got hit.. You can go read the post on that from November 6th I think...
Sorry.. here is the edit with the links...
Journal Entry Denton County Jail Lookup
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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| Monday, March 18th, 2002
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12:09 pm - Since...
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Well, since I didn't write in my journal last night, one can only imagine what happened. She came home...
It wasn't the kind of meeting I liked... not at all. She came into my house and I noticed a rather large bruise on her neck. It kind of looked like a hickey. I was laying on my bed when she walked in and sat down, and she had tears in her eyes. I knew right then and there what had happened and what I was going to have to do.
It turns out that she had gone to a spring break party and had consumed large amounts of alchohol :( I guess that is the excuse for all infedelity. Fuck that bullshit. I have been drunk plenty of times, and never fucked around. I can't believe it. Anyhow, she ended up hookin up with 2 guys while she was away. She came clean like a dirty fucking rag that was thrown into the laundry with a whole can of bleach.
Btw.. I am just kidding.. :) None of that happened at all...
She came into my house at around 10:30 or so, and I hugged her and told her she could never leave again. She told me what a great time she had on her trip and wrote me a letter every night. She had a Huge sun burn, and had her hair all braided up. It looked REAL good. I wanted to hump her right there! How bad is that huh? Talkin about humpin on my burnt braided girlfriend. Anyhow, after we talked and smoked for a bit she had to run off home. It was great seeing her. I really really really missed her.... I made her listen to the fucked up message she left me on my voicemail at work, and she apologized. Hell, she even apologized for it in one of the letters she wrote me. She said she was just really mad and thought I didn't answer the phone on purpose. Like I would do that to her!
Anyhow, I am done for now...
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(5 comments | comment on this)
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| Saturday, March 16th, 2002
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7:52 pm - Day #7 (cont)
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Ok.. it is now 7:52pm at night, and I am sitting here after a VERY busy day. Here is what happened :)
I woke up at around 11:30 and strolled my happy ass into the shower. Got out and went up to the Tuxedo shop and got fitted for my tuxedo. It is a pimp ass tux, and thank god they had a 40 dollar off prom special, or else the tux woulda been somewhere around 160 bones! Good God..
Moving right along, I went to go get my oil changed, and the place I usually get it done at was closing up its doors. That sucks, cause I really need one bad. So I guess I will do it tomorrow.
After that I went to Chris's house and picked him up. I went and made a car payment on my car, and also figured out that I will have that motha fucka completely paid off in January of '03. That is some GREAT fucking news considering I just bought the bitch in August of '01! I guess it does pay off to pay extra on that bitch, and beat some of the fucking finance charges.
After we got done there, we went to the Record store. I got 2 new BAD ass trance records, and met Bill from Bills Records. Older man, and doesn't talk alot, but he knows his shit. I also got Erin a CD of one of her Favorite DJ's that plays at a club here in Dallas. His name is Andy... You can see him on Friday Nights at the Lizzard Lounge in the TV room. I saw it, I had to get it for her...
Then we went to the mall. I needed some new shoes, which I got, and I also got the watch Erin gave me for V-day fitted so it fits perfectly now. I can wear it all the time now, and be a happy man.
After all of that jazz, we went back to CHris's house and played with the new Records I got, then I came home. I am sitting here now, just counting the hours till she gets back. She is supposed to be home sometime tomorrow, and hopefully, if I AM LUCKY, she will have the time to come by and see me.
You know, this is kinda the first time we have been a part for a long time since we first started this relationship. I have been worrying, that somehow we fell in a routine, and now that that routine is broken, that she is gonna think that she doesn't need me as much as she did before. I dunno, maybe I am just talking nonesense and I probably just got myself in trouble with that line. I won't lie... It has been a break from my girlfriend, and I have survived it. I have had fun this week, but I also realized something very important as well. There are plenty of old addages about "You don't realize what you have till it is gone" blah blah blahzay. I try my hardest to treat Erin nice, and sometimes with my needy personality, and lifestyle, it might be a lil too imposing on her. I told her that when we first started seeing each other that in a relationship it was my personal view, that neither one of us should ever, and I mean EVER have to compete for each others time.. I have REALLY put her through that test. She will tell me that she is going to go out with some friends, and although I tell her it is ok, and she doesn't have to ask me if she can go, I always give the impression that I don't want her to go. That is my selfishness. I have never tried to take her away from her friends.. I have really only tried to get myself involved with them as well. Maybe that isn't what I should be doing. Everyone needs their friends.. Everyone needs time alone.... I have done everything I could to surround myself with her to let her know how much she means to me, but I have neglected myself in that catagory, and in turn, made her neglect herself. I won't lie!! There is no one else in the world I would rather spend time with, but like I said.. Everyone needs a break sometimes.. I am making a committment on trying to give her whatever time she needs.
I know you are real into lyrics girlfriend, so here is some lyrics for you...
In a way, it's all a matter of time I will not worry for you, You'll be just fine Take my thoughts with you, and when you look behind You will surely see a face that you recognize
You're not alone, I'll wait till the end of time Open your mind, Surely it's plain to see You're not alone, I'll wait till the end of time for you Open your mind, Surely there's time to be with me
It is the distance, that makes life a little hard Two minds that once were close, Now so many miles apart I will not falter though, I'll hold on till you're home Safely back where you belong, And see how our love has grown
You're not alone, I'll wait till the end of time Open your mind, Surely it's plain to see You're not alone, I'll wait till the end of time for you Open your mind, Surely there's time to be with me
:)
You = muh world
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2:13 am - Day #7
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Does this even count as Day 7 since it is like 2 in the morning? Probably... I will add more later..
I am sitting here at my house, just coming home from a club, and I have to admit, I had a blast tonight. The only thing is, it is the first time to go to a club without Erin in like 7 months!! I am lonely now.. at least when she goes with me, I get to talk to her till we both fall asleep from exhaustion.
I have also realized, that I will no longer be going to a club without Erin any longer. I don't mean to toot my own horn, but I am quite the skilled dancer, and when you take a decent looking guy, that can dance, with no girlfriend to protect him, the ravaging beasts come out and come out strong! This is the break down...
I went out to a club here in Dallas called The Red Jacket... Now it is my first time to go on a Friday where they haven't had a major DJ headlining, so there was a dress code. Now if you know me, or have seen any of the pictures of me, you will always notice one thing. Thats right kiddies, I always have a fucking hat on. Welp.. NOT TONIGHT!!! Thank god I went and got my haircut cause I had to leave my hat in the car for fuck sake. The main reason we were going to this club was to get my friend Chris, who has recently parted ways with his girlfriend of 2 years, back into the game and to possibly try and hook him up some tail... I know that sounds wrong, but I mean hell.. You know why most single guys go to clubs!!
Anyways, moving on. We got there at around 10ish or so, and it was still pretty empty. We basically just stood back, did some dancing off to the side and fucked around. The way the dance area is set up at this club is there is a huge dance pit in the middle of the room, surrounded by a railing about 4 foot off the wall where people can peer at the dance floor. We moseyed on over to the railing just to chill and catch our breath, and I go and stand next to this chick. I hadn't even noticed or paid attention to her really, but Chris was there dancing up a storm, and Brett looked over at him and goes, "Hey dude, she is checking you out and I think she likes!"
So Chris goes over and puts the mack down on this chick, Nadiya(spelling) I think her name was. They hit it off I guess, and we basically just bullshitted around with her for the rest of the night. She came by herself to a club, so I guess she came to meet people, or just have fun, or somethign... I dunno. Anyhow, on her way out, Chris gave her his cell phone and was like, put your number in blah blah blah. She took it and stared at it for a second, and Chris realized that his fuckin phone still had his ex-girlfriends name as like the main message on it. She ended up putting the number in and all was well I guess. We'll see of course. She had some interesting tails too! She supposedly from what I heard has danced for 10 years, looked like hip hop style to me, and also is into Street Racing... I think the first thing I heard her say next to her name was that she was going to drop some NOS into her car. That is Nitrous Oxide... Makes you go really fast.. Anyhow, if that is the case.. cool.
During the course of the night though, I have to admit, I have never quite been grabbed, groped, pulled, and pushed as much as I was tonight. I sat there and pretty much was wishing Erin was there most of the time... I had fun, and I missed her. It was an experience that I will probably not endulge myself in again.
So now I am sitting here at 2:25 in the morning, and am thinking about her. I came home and fed my cat, and checked my messages on my phone... Still no call from her at all. I would do anything to hear her voice right now to tell me that she misses me and she is thinking about me... Even though I am still kinda mad about the other day and how she wasted her 30 second phone call telling me how I let her down... BLAH... Anyhow, that is another matter.
Get home soon Monkey... I miss you.. :(
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(8 comments | comment on this)
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| Friday, March 15th, 2002
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9:42 am - Day #6
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Day 6 already.... Time is starting to go by faster! I am not sure if that is a good thing or a bad thing! Hahahh... I am in a great mood today, cause of 4 things..
#1. Today is payday.... This one explains itself
#2. Today is wha? Friday beotches! Today is Friday and I am always in a good mood on Friday
#3. I have decided to go to a Club tonight with some of my friends. I finally got my license back, so I can cruise around with the new System I got! As exciting as that is, it is the first time I have gone to a Club since I have been wtih Erin. I figure she gets to go on a week long Spring Break Cruise? I should get to go to a club... It is simple as that!
#4. I am one day closer to getting her back in town. She comes back Sunday sometime. She said depending on when she gets back in town is going to decide if she is going to come and see me or not.... I don't think that is acceptable, so she needs to see me regardless of what time she gets back in town.
I made my first CD yesterday. Tonight we are going to bump it on the way out to the club. I am excited about it... Anyhow, I am gonna jet.. LATE!
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(comment on this)
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| Thursday, March 14th, 2002
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2:24 pm - Suck ass again...
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If this fucking week could get any fucking worse I would probably lock myself in the garage with the car running... Fuckin A!
Today I get called into my managers office and am told that he and a group of his bosses (mostly VP's) had called in pretending to be a customer. Now I know there are a lot of mom and pop compnaies out there for granted, and that wouldn't mean much, however I work for a Multibillion dollar company or close to it. Anyhow, as it seems, in big large companies like that, everything gets impersonal, and everyone, and I MEAN EVERYONE, is expendable.
Anyhow, these guys are pretending to be a customer who is inquiring about purchasing a product that we have recently thrown into Maintenance Mode. For anyone who doesn't know what this means, it simply means that we will no longer be developing this product, but we will continue to support it until your current license expires with our Company. We have quit selling and will not sell at all.
Anyhow, they call in and talk to a front line rep. They can't handle the call, and then they escalate it to me. With all the information that has been bestowed upon me I simply state the obvious facts. Now 2 weeks ago we were given a cheat sheet with the option to read from it. However, now after a lengthy discussion with my manager in his office, we are supposed to read this word for word. I can handle that, and I can also handle that maybe I didn't hear properly.
Ever since I have worked with this company in the department I have worked in, our #1 job as far as taking care of escalations has been to try and deflect these calls from Management. Why you may ask? Because that is the impression we have been given. Now since there has been a shakeup in the upper upper echelons of management, there is a new policy we need to do. As of today, since I was following "old" procedure" we are to get any customer with management that so deems necessary. Quite a policy change, when the people following these policies find out about it after everyone else? The lack of communication and flow of information from one level of Management to the next, then to us, is down right pathetic and annoying. It is worse than when you were 6 and played the telephone game. You know what I am talking about right? One person starts saying one thing, then by the time you get to the last person in the 30 person cycle it comes out as not even close to what it was supposed to be.
Now I give you this.. I get paid pretty well for the job I do. In fact I get paid better than most people that do the same kind of work I do, however this is not a professional place. You can argue that since I work in an office, and I deal with end users, and customers on a daily basis, that there is an "aura" of professionalism in this place, but I promise you, this is not what I thought corporate America was about. I had this vision of everything flowing smoothly. I had a vision that there were things set up to keep things running, and going. I had a vision of people actually sitting down and working a problem, in and out of the box. I did not have the idea of a 20 year old kid being put in charge of a department, that has dealt and consumed more drugs than your local pharmacy. Everyone that gets together to make these policies go in and do a half ass job. Then they sit around and pat each other on the back, but the one thing they don't do is FUCKING COMMUINCATE it to the people who are actually tasked to deal with the problems.
So now I sit here, after getting out of my managers office, with this feeling that I have failed somewhere. I have now made myself look like an ass to a room full of upper management and executive officers. My name has a big fucking smudge on it now. Do you know why? Cause there wasn't the proper communication...
This week has sucked, and today is a big fucking exclamation point on that.
I ahve so much pent up frustration right now, that I could fucking pop. I can see how a postal worker could take a gun in and fucking lay waste to people that he worked with. If he had to deal with shit like this!! Hell I woulda helped him! I sit here and stew and muster, and pray for patience, and happiness.... I must confess that I am losing hope for both right now...
I have also noticed I am very VERY long winded.... I wonder if that is a bad thing... or not.. I don't fuckin know..
Fuck off world, ain't no one here who cares at the moment...
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11:00 am - Great Background..
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7:51 am - Day #5
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These entries keep coming sooner and sooner don't they? Well fuck, I can't help it! I miss tha girl. After I got home from work last night, I started getting this helpless feeling about how if she thought I didn't answer the phone on purpose that she might start thinking things. I dunno, just made me feel helpless.. I laid down in bed at 6:30pm and just kinda relaxed for a bit. The next thing I know it is 5:00am. I guess out of pure habbit when I woke up, I dialed Erin's home number... I hung up before it started ringing cause I remember she wasn't there. It sucked... I stayed up and came into work early this morning.. Good thing too.. There appears to be a virus outbreak today that could turn bad. They caught it in Japan last night, and we have had some people get it in the USA. In about 2 minutes we will find out how bad it has affected North America so I better run. I still miss Erin, and I can't wait till she gets home. Maybe, just maybe, she will be able to call me today....
I might write more later.. not sure.. depends on how busy I am...
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(comment on this)
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| Wednesday, March 13th, 2002
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12:03 pm - Day #4
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I figured I would write this in the early afternoon to show how annoyed I am. Erin called, and seeing is how I am at work, I am not always at my desk or near my phone. My job requires me to go from desk to desk and make sure things are happening that need to happen. Anyhow, she calls, and this is what she says word for word in an attitude voice that not only broke my heart, but infuriated me...
Erin : "Ya it is me, umm thanks for answering, um I have a penny left so I can't really call you for the rest of the trip and Julie had to give me 2 dollars in quarters, and you didn't answer so that is really good. So ya.. I got 24 seconds to talk, so Hey, it is like you let me down. Thank you for not answering the phone again. I love you bye."
Rip my heart out and make me feel like the worst person in the fucking world why dontcha? If I could put into words how hurt I am right now, I would, but I can't even fucking attempt it. With the amount of loneliness and boredom that I feel right now, only to have that said to me? Holy shit? I wanna go crawl in a hole a bawl my eyes out.
I have this "LiveJournal" and it has basically come down to a journal about my girlfriend. I would gather to say that 90% of the posts in this thing revolve around her. I say on a daily basis what this girl means to me, and how special she is. I dunno..... I am so hurt.
As of 12:00pm today, this just became a real real shitty day. So just for your record when you read this Erin... Thank you for calling, I really do appreciate it and I love hearing your voice, but you made this day teh sux.
I still love ya, but damn...
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(comment on this)
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| Tuesday, March 12th, 2002
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11:52 pm - Day #3
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I barely squeaked this one in, because I lost track of time while playing a video game. I have been trying to keep my mind as occupied as possible so I don't think about not being able to talk to my baby.
Anyhow, today's highlights include : Erin called my work and I got to speak with her for about 5 minutes. She was in tears most of the time cause she misses me. I miss her sooo much. It was soo great to hear her voice. She just got her hair twisted up and braided which is real cool. I can't wait to see it. I bet it looks REAL good. I think that is such an attractive look anyhow. She told me that she loved me, and missed me, and enjoyed the pictures I gave her of me. I am glad... I was a happy man for the most of the day cause I got to talk to her. Then when I came home I got all sad again. Everytime the phone rang I was hoping it was her. Anytime anyone would call I would tell them how much I missed her. I am sure they all think I am pathetic, but oh well. I am gonna go ahead and jet off now. I just wanted to share todays news. Still miss you sugar!
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(comment on this)
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| Monday, March 11th, 2002
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9:37 pm - Day #2
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As I continue my week long journey without the company of my girlfriend, I am reminded how many things I may take for granted. Perhaps this can serve as a reminder that everything is precious. I always see a ton of people on here depressed, and I guess it is my turn to be sad. I am not really depressed, just kinda lonely. Sure I could go out and hang with some friends, but I would rather just sit here, hoping for a call :) How pathetic is that? Fuck if ya think it is!! :)
Lets see... Day 2 day 2.... Couple things to note today.... I once again felt shitty about not being able to wake up my girlfriend like I have done every day for the past 6.5 months. Sucks not being able to start your morning off right. As I was driving home in the car tonight I started to think about life. I thought more and more about socializing, and being with someone. I mean if you think about it, what is the point of doing something, either living, playing, working, etc etc if you can't actually share it with someone? I mean do you think that if there was one person left on this earth, that they would sit there and try and figure out what happened 65 million years ago with the Dinosaurs? Probably not... The reason that person does that, is so they can share it with someone else. I mean yes, they might be doing it partly for themselves, but I also believe that most of the time, people tend to do things for another person, or a community of people.
Today when I got home from work I downloaded some music, and taped myself dancing a lil bit to see if I could come up with some new moves for the club, called my brother, called my dad, and re-arranged my room. I also cleaned it up a bit too. I wish I could move my DSL jack into my bedroom, so I could have my computer in there. Maybe with my next paycheck I will go buy about 40 foot of Cat5 and run it to my bedroom.In any case I miss my girlfriend. The phone has rang 3 times tonight, and each time I had hoped it was her. I hope she is having a great time, and I can't wait till tomorrow to get to hear from her. At least I hope I get to hear from her. She said she would get a calling card... I have soo much to tell her. I got a letter from the State of Texas today telling me that my license had been re-instated, and that I am good to go as far as all that jazz. You have no clue how stoked I am. Considering the fact that I have been driving on a suspended license for the past 7 months? Once again I am a legal driver, and have no worry of being hauled off to jail when I get pulled over for the headlight that I am too lazy to replace.
With that being said, it is time to finish my laundry, and put things away in my room. I am getting my Vacuum back from Chris tomorrow. I forgot I let him borrow it the last time he had a party. OH YEAH, and tomorrow I am recording my first set from the turntables. It will probably be around 30 minutes long or so, but I am excited anyways to have some of my own shit to play in my car. As exciting as that is, I am going to head out now.
I miss you Erin..... Speaking of which.. this is what she looks like for all of you journal readers...

Ok I am outie....
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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| Sunday, March 10th, 2002
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10:39 pm - Day #1
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I am going to keep a day by day entry of my feelings while my girlfriend is out of town. Well I am going to at least try. Even thought it is very late in the day, I am still overwhelmed with a sort of desparity I believe would be the right word.
She gave me a call this morning at 3:29am to let me know she was leaving for the airport. I kinda figured she would call me right before she left, instead of when she woke up like she promised. She has a tendancy to do those type of things. I had contemplated staying awake until she called, just so I could be sure that I was coherant when she called, but I realized I would have to stay up till around 3:30 for her to call. I couldn't do it, so I crashed out at around midnight. She called, and I talked to her for a couple seconds. Today when I woke up at 7:45, I realized that it was the first time in a little over 6 months that I didn't get to wake her up and tell her I was awake. Suck ass if ya ask me. This being apart doesn't really work well for me...
As we continue on with the days emotions, I tried to keep myself as occupied as I could. I did everything in my power to shut out the feeling of being alone. I played video games most of the morning, ate some left over lasagnia, and then watched a movie. I took a nap, and woke up in time to watch the CBS Special 9/11. Little does Erin know I got a tape and taped it for her. She wanted to see it sooooo bad, so I figure it would be a good way of letting her know I was thinking about her. Anyhow, right in the middle of the movie I was watching she called from her cruise ship just to let me know she was there. I think we talked for about 2 minutes, and I told her to call me back collect if she could, because she couldn't afford the charges. She never called back, so I am assuming the collect calling didn't work. It is ok I guess... I just felt kinda needy... Hell I still do..
I wrote her a nice little letter, and put in 3 pictures of me with it so she can look at me I guess while she is out there. I am sure she won't have that much free time to be worrying about me, cause she is going all over the place on her cruise... Cosumel(spelling), Jamaca, Cancun I think.. Not sure on the last one.
So now I sit here at 10:45 in the evening on a Sunday wanting so bad just to hear the sound of her voice telling me good night. I know it is gonna be hard to go to sleep.....Maybe I will just go swig on some Nyquil... I dunno.. I still have a whole week before I can see her, and another 2 days before she docks to get a calling card.
As I was cruising through some web sites, this caught my eye.... So I will close with it.
1000 Times For 1
If I have kissed you once, I have kissed you 1000 times.
Each morning as I arise. Each night as I drift to sleep. Each hour of every day. Each moment before it goes away.
The kisses shared between you and I, Have many times reached the sky. As your lips part and anxiousness increases, Your heart pounds and breathing ceases.
My lips leap to yours hungry for the taste. Sweetness drips from you to me As desire grows, my heart races. Inches apart seem as miles waiting.
The miles increase as space shortens. Time appears to stand still. So close yet so far. When? Now, please now?
Once more, 1001. Make it 2, so many more. Caressing ever caressing those Tender lips, each time as the first.
Goodnight....
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(comment on this)
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| Wednesday, March 6th, 2002
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6:53 pm - Because my girlfriend is Sad...
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For the love of my life.. May she know that I have killed kittens.... Thousands of them...
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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| Monday, March 4th, 2002
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10:47 am - Blam... In yo Eye
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Everyone has this image of themselves. Depending on your own personal mood that image will change. Anyone else ever notice that? I know I have...
Anyhow, this weekend was nice, but akward as well.
Friday Erin came over and stayed the night. We went to a club, and then just came back to my house and crashed. Saturday she came back over that night and stayed the night again. I swear it is really nice having someone to grab onto when you are asleep. It is even better when it is a person you are in love with. Erin was a hard sleeper on Saturday night, so I spent most of the night just trying to comfort her. At one time I woke up and was just laying there rubbing her stomach while she was asleep. Shortly after I stopped she started having a nightmare. I could tell she was having a nightmare, and I just wrapped my arms around her. I am not sure if you are supposed to wake someone up when having a nightmare, and I don't think I ever would. I think nightmares are theraputic in a way. Anyhow, when she woke up from her nightmare she saw me staring at her with my arms wrapped around her. I am a light sleeper, so she figured that she woke me up. I explained to her I could tell she was having a bad dream and wrapped my arms around her, blah blah. I just wanted her to feel the love so to speak.
As far as the akward part of the weekend... Well without going into any specifics, there were certain things that I wanted, that I couldn't have, and certain things that Erin could have done, that she didn't. She doesn't know why she doesn't do these things, and in my opinion doesn't have a real good reason, but I dunno..I am not going to stop loving her, but it does put a strain on things when we fight...
Thas enough for now...
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